A Nugget in My Pocket

For the past several months,
I have been in Yoga Teacher Training-

I love what yoga does for my mind and my body,
I love that yoga provides for me something that
NOTHING else can even compare with.
I love the concept of yoga,
the poses of yoga and the
application of yoga to daily life-

I guess it's safe to say that
I <3 YOGA!

So while I am in my 
"What do I want to do when I grow up" stage,
I thought doing Yoga Teacher Training would be fun!

I have loved it,
BUT I have to confess, that it has really
taken me on an emotional road of
self discovery and self awareness
that I was TOTALLY unprepared for!

I'm not sure if this happens to everyone-
or just someone like me who is carrying more
garbage than they know about or
want to admit.

One thing that has just been KILLING me
over the past several YEARS
is some decisions that my hubs and I have made
that have me really conflustered!

Because going into them would take all
the cloud space google has to offer, I will
spare you the details-
but in a nutshell, I just can't seem to find any
peace or comfort in this one set of questions.

Well, as I was studying one day,
I had a distinct feeling that I needed to
Quit counting LOSSES-

Devastating MN bridge collapse

HUH, what do you mean 'counting losses'?
It didn't take long before I understood-

Beautiful lesson in the value of family, wellness and gratitude for each day

Over the past 5-6 years we have moved
from wonderful home,
to temporarily living in a friends basement,
to dream home,
to 21 hotel rooms,
back to dream home,
to temporary housing in CA,
to rental home,
to another 4 month temp stint in a hotel,
to dream neighborhood (not so dream home),
to temporary housing in TX,
to TX home...

Did you keep up??
Yeah! Me either!!

Sometimes a blessing is just around the corner of that little maze of life

Anyway,
we have tried really hard to have good attitudes-
we've teased about many of the dynamics of
each crazy living arrangement.
We've laughed, we've joked,
we've made the best of EVERY situation-
until now.
And for some reason, the emotions of the past
several years have crept up and gotten a tight
grasp on a lot of our hearts.

So as I was studying and pondering the impact
of all these moves on my courage and faith to move
forward in uncertain situations, I realized that I
am more cautious, more timid and less trusting
and outgoing than I normally have been.
And I've realized that I kinda don't like it!

I realized I have been counting losses that have
been accumulated over the course of all this change-
loss of stabilty,
loss of friends,
loss of connection,
loss of time due to acclimation,
loss of time due to emotions left unchecked,
loss of..... the list is long-

But by counting all these losses,
I was completely and totally neglecting
all the GAINS of the past several years-
gain of experience,
gain of knowledge,
gain of travel,
gain of friends,
gain of perspective,
gain of empathy,
gain of.... and the list can go on and on-

Annual 4th of July Bike Parade

Friends from birth-

It was such a simple switch,
such a simple & beautiful concept,
and such an empowering concept,
that for some reason I had completely missed it all
while out planning my own Pity Party.

I wish I could declare to friends and family that
this life is all about wonder and beauty and blessings
and abundance and ease and comfort and security
and health and wellness and goodness-

Blessings abound in every obstacle we might face

It just ain't
(that was life before the apple)

BUT 
even amidst it's trial and testing and challenges
and obstacles and doubt and confusion and
frustration and disappointment and
unrealized dreams and hardship and loss
and suffering and pain-
LIFE HAS
has elements of Heaven wrapped up in every day-
we might have to look,
we might have to do a little digging and
for sure, definitely, and most likely
we might have to put on different colored glasses
to see it-
but I know like I know nothing else that
mercy, grace and absolute love
FILL our very existence
every day, every hour, every minute-

Do you see gross dog germs or the faithful companionship between a girl and her dog?

It all depends on if we are going to pick these
little nuggets up and carry them away in our back pockets!

Parenting 101: Find a Worthy Mentor

This is the FIFTH post in a series of SIX

about simple tips that have made a HUGE 

impact on the way I have chosen to raise my 

children.

I've definitely offered the disclaimer that perfect,

I AM NOT-

However, I am 100% confident that these simple

nuggets of advice have made ALL the difference

in how I have raised my children. 

This little Parenting tidbit originates in the Bible-

In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus is training us on

how to be better people, better stewards and 

ultimately how to become like Him. 

Matthew 7:9-10 offers this counsel, 

"or what man is there of you, whom if his son ask bread, 

will he give him a stone? Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent?”  

I think on this often as I consider the relationship 

I have, or want to have with my children and 

as I ponder over the specific needs that they might have.  

Too scared to go on and too courageous to quit

Someone to give a little one on one encouragement

These verses are especially helpful to me 

when I am faced with a difficult situation with one of our children, 

I try to think more on how my Heavenly Father would 

handle the situation rather than how I WANT to handle the situation. 

In every situation we find ourselves in, 

our Father wants to provide a way for us to learn and 

to become better. 

I try to keep that same focus when I need to council 

or even reprimand our children.

Heavenly Father really wants only what is best for us, 

and we can be sure that He will never give us any less than that. 

I find it so much easier to serve and help my children when 

I keep things in perspective of how our Heavenly Father 

constantly loves, serves, teaches, and guides us. 

No matter what the situation, if I slow down long enough 

to ask myself how a perfect and loving Father would handle 

this exact moment, this exact trial or this exact behavior-

I receive the words I need and the understanding required

to teach a righteous truth to my children. 

It is these moments that always seem to end 

positive for both parent and child.

Balancing weight, size and the center stability

Another aspect of this scripture that I love is that as 

I try to align my parenting style with that of my Heavenly Father, 

my relationship with Heavenly Father increases tremendously. 

I become more aware that everything we are given, 

whether it is a blessing or a trial is a gift from our Father 

and intended for nothing more than our good and our experience.  

I have more faith when things are tough, because I am learning 

that He loves me and only wants what is best for me. 

For me, I have chosen my Heavenly Father as the
pattern for my parenting.
However, I will say,
there are A LOT of people that I know have sincerely
impacted who I am and what type of parent I want to be.
It would be horribly misguiding if I left the influence of
many friends, family members and leaders out of the mix.

The old adage that says 'It takes a village to raise a child'
is right on the money in more ways than one.

Extended Family at a Group Obstacle Course learning the value of team work

Me about to go through the final hole in a spider web of challenge! Honestly the things we can accomplish with teamwork

But ultimately, it is YOU who will influence YOUR children
the most!
At least, in my opinion, that is what I aim for.
There are too many scary and dangerous influences that
have the ability to touch our children's lives
(but that is an entirely different matter altogether)

Find your pattern, mold yourself to it
and do not stray from your values,
your ideals,
your instinct in raising wonderful children.

Parenting 101: Create Oppurtunity

Today, I have the fourth post in my Parenting 101 series :)

If you want a re-cap of what I've suggested already 

start here for the introduction and 

Tip #1 is here
and tips #2 is here

Before I go on, I just really want to let you know

that my home is NOT perfect,

my kids are NOT perfect

Family Photo Flop #12,459

and by all means...

I AM NOT PERFECT- not even close!

What brings me to sharing this advice 

with whoever will listen is an overwhelming sense of 

gratitude that I was not alone in raising my own kiddos.

Every good picture is found in a batch of 250 not so good pictures

Though, I don't want to take away from 

any effort that my hubby and I put into raising our children,

there is NO way I want to take the credit for most of 

the habits and attitudes that we created in our home.

EVERYTHING I have done or will continue to do has been

a direct result of help from above!

I have been prompted to start a habit and not until

several years later have I seen the results of that habit formed.

If I deserve any credit at all,

it has merely been that I've been a good listener. 

Nothing more-

But I promise you that these Parenting Tips are the very core

of how we've raised our own children-

and though they won't create perfect kids-

they will create a more peaceful home environment!

That much I can testify to with all my heart.

So now on to the meat of the matter!

Proverbs 22:6 councils parents to 

“Train up a child in the way he should go; 

and when he is old, he will not depart from it.”

I live by this mantra with my kids-

Create in your homes the opportunity to feel the 

benefits of a job well done

(and by benefits I don't mean a candy bar or 

ice cream cone if they get their homework done)

Create in your home the very personal opportunity to 

feel the spirit and receive answers to prayers. 

This does not just happen naturally in a busy home, 

you have to actively seek and create these opportunities. 

It is important to be prepared at all times to bear testimony 

of the principles you value and want to help your children

appreciate and value as well. 

If we can teach them to find their own 

testimonies while they are in the protection of our homes, 

they will be better prepared to bear that testimony to their friends 

and to stand firm when faced with temptations or trials.

Long ago I had a dear friend give me some council that 

shaped my thoughts and attitudes. 

She is older than I am, she married a little later in life

and never had children. 

I was bemoaning that she had so much time to dedicate

to personal study and worship. 

She said, “Treisha, you were called to be a missionary

and trainer to SIX of God's most valiant soldiers 

that will certainly be needed in our Heavenly Fathers 

army standing for what is truth and righteousness. 

I was called for another work. It’s important that we EACH

fulfill our callings to our better than best ability.” 

I love that she viewed motherhood as missionary work. 

I think my outlook and approach to parenting changed 

a lot that day. I started to view my role as a mother as much 

more than an endless “To Do list” and more of an endless 

“To Teach” list! 

Don't discount the small stuff you do in your homes.

Dedicate one night a week as Family Night,

a night when NO other commitment can interfere, 

including email, texts and social media notifications!

Enjoying an FC Dallas game in Texas

Study the scriptures together-

your kiddos WILL learn from them and with instruction

WILL learn to apply them to their own lives.

Enjoy family meal time- nightly if possible.

It is around the kitchen table to that I learn the most 

about my children. They may not tell me they've had a bad 

day when I say "How was school", but when they are at the 

table and I can SEE their demeanor is lackluster-

I know to push a little harder and get to the core of their needs

BEFORE I send them off to bed to fret over their concerns. 

Raising a Family is truly a TEAM effort- maintain strong family bonds

Consider if you clean your house once a year-

It's a long, tedious & unpleasant job. 

But, if you do just a little cleaning each day & 

with the help of others it goes quick, and 

sometimes you end up having a little fun along the way! 

The same is true with teaching and raising our children, 

especially where spirituality is concerned. 

If we teach spiritual matters in our home infrequently, 

it is a tedious task for our children and we tend to lose their attention. 

But if we share spiritual thoughts and teachings, 

a little each day, we earn their attention and 

they have room enough to receive what we teach. 

Deuteronomy 6:6-7 says, “And these words, 

which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: 

And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, 

and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, 

and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, 

and when thou risest up.” 

So basically ALWAYS is a good time for teaching your children

the truth that you want them to learn.

Huddled together on a very COLD day at the beach

ALWAYS is the time for guiding them and instructing them 

on becoming the Adults you want them to be!

One of the scarier moments in my parenting career- I no likey heights!

And ALWAYS is the time to build and fortify the values

that will keep your children safe, secure and prepared 

for a life of joy, peace and fulfillment. 

Parenting 101

A few months ago, I was asked to speak
to a large group of adults in our area.
My topic was "Successful Parenting"
If that wasn't intimidating enough-
the gentleman who asked me said,
"Now what we are really looking for
is practical tips and ideas that can be taken
home and implemented immediately into
the homes of those who attend. We want
them to feel empowered and successful."

Yumminess at Millions of Milkshakes

HOLY COW! I stopped breathing and
IMMEDIATELY had a non stop movie
playing in my mind of ALL the things
I've done to completely scar my children!

If you're going to fight, You're going to be glued together at the hip :) until you can get along

I've spoken to big groups before,
I've spoken about really sensitive topics-
but Parenting, this is a very personal topic!!
Parenting is one of those things that can stir
a lot of emotions- people can easily feel judged,
inadequate, defensive--
and when any of that happens,
lots of people just turn off and come up with
a million reasons why "that won't work at my house!"

He's FINALLY Home!!! Dinner at Chuy's

Man, this felt like a heavy task-
and I didn't want to get it wrong in any way!

I started with a great big prayer
(and a zillion little ones)
and thought about the wonderful gift
that parenting is to me!

Take Part in Fun Family Activities

It is hard, it is often thankless,
and it is always EXHAUSTING...
but if you can step back out of all of that
and realize what a gift it is to be able to influence
the direction, course and outcome of someone's
life- to be THE person that someone thinks of
when they think safe, secure and happy!

Graduation, NOW on to College

My friends,
I KNOW parenting is a gift.

Family Photo Shoot a Million Years Ago

After much thought,
I came up with a defining moment in my
own parenting journey.
It was the realization that my focus needs to be
on a "To Teach" list and not on my normal "To Do" list!

Fun and Happiness, No Matter where we are!

It was when I began to look at my role as a mother
in this way- as a teacher and guide of my children's life journey
that I realized nothing seemed burdensome or tedious anymore.
Nothing seemed trite or menial in my day,
I found an increased desire to help them GAIN something
out of our time together and we found reason to
incorporate joy, team work and beauty into every day-

More than Anything, my hope is that my children are Friends & Lifelong Support Staff for each other

Because let's face it-
"Men are that they might have joy" 2 Nephi 2:25

Relaxing Together & Working Together create a Family that Stays Together

I shared five suggestions that seem to have
made a positive impact on our family. Because
they are very general, there is plenty of room to customize
these suggestions for your home and family life.
Watch for more detail on each suggestion through the week:

 Suggestions for Successful Parenting

1. Create a Vision for Your Family

2. See the Potential in Your Children that they often
can't see in themselves

3. Create in Your Homes Opportunity for Children
to recognize the Spirit of the Lord early in their Lives

4. Hold Regular Family Councils AND Involve the
Children in Big Decisions

5. When BIG Issues Arise, Follow after the Parenting
of a Loving Heavenly Father- His ways will ALWAYS
show you what is needed in your home

Not Gonna Take That Opinion

I went to the doctor the other day.
My arthritis has really been raging
and my allergies are LIKE
way out of control- which is causing
a whole myriad of issues that I
would like to get under control!
So I took this opportunity to try
out a new doctor...

I am desperately searching for a
local doctor that can handle my
health & my wellness!!

I take my health care a little like the good ole'
Donny & Marie song,
"I'm a little bit country,
and a little bit Rock n' Roll"
but more like,
"I want a little bit Western medicine
 
and a little bit Eastern thought"






I have a health issue-
but I don't want it to define
me in any way-
but it's there, and it has
to be considered when thinking
about the whole me-
but let me say again-
I DON'T WANT IT TO DEFINE
WHO I AM OR WHAT I CAN DO!

There is a very fine line,
and a very special balance
between the two...


So I am looking for a doctor who
can manage my lupus,
but more importantly can support my
personal health & wellness goals.

I had just such a doctor in CA,
and she was a gem,
but I just can't seem to find one here
YET! It'll come, I know!

But in the search,
I have found some real doozies!!
(is that a real word?)

The guy I saw a few days ago,
was one such doozie!
After making me wait over an hour
(that don't impressa me much)
and proceeding to talk about
everything that didn't matter to me,
he explained that the reason I don't feel
quite as well here in TX as I did in CA
is because of the constantly changing
barometric pressure,
especially here in North Texas!

Okay, okay, I can believe that weather
plays a PART to how I feel!
He should have stopped there,
I MAY have gone back for a follow up!

But poor guy,
opened his mouth again
(oh such a mistake)
and said the absolutely
WRONG THING
to me-
"I'm afraid that here in North Texas,
this is as good as your gonna get!"
"Umm, what did you say??"
"Oh, sir, you don't know me very well,
this ain't as good as it gets BUDDY"

Don't, I mean, DO NOT
ever take "this is as good as it gets"
as an answer in ANY part of your life.
If I share one piece of information
that is very valuable concerning
health and wellness, it is this-
If you don't like the advice,
it isn't for YOU!!
What sounds ok to one person,
is not ok for another!!

You and ONLY YOU own your
health! Take control, be picky
about who you allow to handle your
health!
Know your body, and if you don't-
get to know it.
 
We get one body, and it is precious.

Being knee deep in flare ups for the past
10 years has taught me one of the most
important lessons of all-
this body is a gift,
a beautiful gift-
it houses a beautiful spirit
full of more good than any of us
can even imagine!
Treat your body good, respect it,
love it and NEVER abuse it!!
If you do that-
you will know NO limitations
spiritually, mentally and physically!

Take a minute and ponder that truth-
and maybe take a minute to think
of all the good that this body has given you!

Grad School or Yoga?

I have wanted to go back
and get my Graduate Degree
for about as long as I can remember-
which nowadays, ain't that long

After years of praying and pondering,
it finally felt like the right time and I jumped.
I decided, applied to grad school, got accepted,
enrolled in classes and started my first day
all in a matter of a few short weeks!!

I was so excited,
I had dreams,
I had vision,
and I had nerves going everywhere-
but I was convinced I was
right where I wanted to be-

And then something unexpected happened
and I didn't LOVE it-
I was doing fine, learning lots,
getting good grades and
lots of commendation for my thoughts and ideas-
but I JUST DIDN'T LOVE IT
AND
I am a FIRM believer that if you don't love
what you are doing-
you should stop doing it-
It's a mantra I live by wholeheartedly!

So I was freaking out a little-
actually A LOT-
like all summer long lots!!

After more prayer than I can count
more late night discussions with my hubby
PRO's and CON's lists a mile long-
I made a decision and offered up one final prayer-

I chose to NOT go back to school fall semester
and pour my heart and soul into OTHER things
that I have wanted to do for years.
If Heavenly Father has something He wants me to do,
I explained that this would be a good time to point me
in the direction He needs me to go-

If I find something
HOORAY!
If not, I go back to school and
HOORAY-

I have struggled with this decision
because...
well, you know,
I am 43 years old
and apparently don't know what I want to be when
I grow up!
But I hear that's not too uncommon

So with faith, I moved forward
and within a few days I was drawn to YOGA
more specifically,
Yoga teacher training-
which I also have wanted to do for several years

yoga on the beach in destin, florida

Miraculously, there was a program that I could enroll in
and have completed before Spring Semester starts in January-
I'm super excited,
though I feel a little weird when I tell my
Academia focused friends-
they look at me like I've just announced that
I'm going to Pixie School to earn my pixie dust!

It going to take a lot of faith
to trust in some unseen path,
but this is something I learned from
my 17 year old daughter this year-

I am on a journey that leads to great and
wonderful things for me, my family
and each and every person that touches my life-

Now if you'll excuse me,
I need to go find my yellow brick road!

What I GET to be!

When I was a young mom,
in the days of feeling overwhelmed,
frazzled and exhausted-

Not all mine, but my house often had more people than we could count

I had a dear friend who told me
to enjoy EVERY day that I have
the privilege of raising my children.
Her reason-
'because one day they grow up and
move away

Proof that they do go away- leaving for an 18 month church mission

and you are left wondering how the
time slipped so quickly away'.

Many a day chaperoning field trips

I am going to be honest and confess
that at the time, I looked at her and thought
'buddy, you're off your rocker'

But not long after,
on a particularly frustrating day,
I stopped and thought about what she said.
And I realized that the wisdom in her
sentiment was the secret clue to mothering
(and parenting)

I changed my perspective from thinking
in terms of 'Everything I have to do in my day"
to thinking of "Everything I get to do in my day"

This helped me a ton to realize that being
with my kids; serving them, playing with them,
being present when they need it most-
all of that is a privilege, a blessing and a gift.

I met some amazing people through classroom volunteering

Just recently, one of my college kids needed
me to cover some expenses that had not been
adequately budgeted for. The money HAD been
there, BUT some really cute clothes, in some
really cute stores seemed to have gotten in the way!

I was a hair irritated,
(to say the least) and was a little less than
wonderful when I had to write the check-

As plain as can be, I had the realization that for
YEARS while I've been raising my children,
I have prayed that we would have the resources to
help them if they ever need it- time, money, talents-
whatever they would need, I pleaded that we
would have the ability to aid them in their
personal development-

Leaving two kids at USU this fall... man do I miss them

and here was a child,
who needed some help
and I had the means to help
AND YET, I was grumbling!!!

Boy oh BOY,
did this message strike me to the core?!

I realized that all the little things we do for our
children and our families can seem really
annoying and bothersome
and it's easy to feel like more like a servant than a
contributing member of society--

Just today, I had to take two lunches to kids at
school because they had left them on the counter-
This used to upset me so much-
I'd go the whole "natural consequences" direction
(if it was recurrent, I would try to fix it)
and refuse to bring the lunches!

The thing is,
I'm a stay at home mom-
have been for 20+ years-
I've played, frolicked, napped
and enjoyed so many WONDERFUL days
because of my MOMHOOD-
why would I have any time to fret
the times I am asked to be up to 
bat to score one for the team??

One more at USU

Mommy-ing can be a little exhausting and
it can seem very thankless at times-

but try to switch your perspective from
everything you have to do each day
(especially those things you have to do
EVERY day)
and focus your attention on all the great
things you GET to BE-
a friend, a confidant, a healer, a hero,
a day rescuer, a wiz at knowing the answer,
a game player, a sounding board
and more important than anything else

an example of EVERYTHING good & virtuous

Here's to MOM's everywhere!